How many times have our children said to us, "Mom (Dad), I really need this!" Sometimes they are talking about the latest fashion. Other times it's the newest electronic gadget. Or maybe it's the most expensive cell phone and/or plan. For middle and upper class parents, it's just so easy to give in and buy our children "what they need." But is that really what is best for them?
I believe that from toddlerhood, we need to teach our children the difference between wants and needs. Toddlerhood you ask? Yes, how many times do we tell the big brother/sister to give in to their younger sibling when they are whining that they need the toy their sibling is playing with? When our children go to school and they see the latest fashions and bookbags, do we rush out and buy those for them? As they become teens, do we stretch the family budget to give our children everything they need so they will fit in with the cool crowd?
Stop and think. How will our children learn to set priorities and work towards goals if we give them everything they "need?" Instead, what about suggesting that they write down a plan for purchasing the thing that they desperately think they need. This can also help to avoid the pitfalls of children growing up needing instant gratification.
You may ask how an elementary school child can save up for their own purchases. Many children get birthday or Christmas money. You may allow the child to clean and return bottles. Children can get a small payment for doing extra work such as raking the lawn. I think saving and budgeting is a whole topic to discuss at another time. The point is, do our children know the difference between a want and a need? Or do we jump to provide every little request that our child makes?
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