Helping teens develop a sense of purpose.

The headlines in our paper and talk throughout our rual town has been about the recent rash of burgularies inlcuding  dozens of reports of breakins, thefts and vandalism.  Even the skate park, which should have been appreciated enough to avoid damage has had to be closed because of vandalism. These events make me think that maybe the youth in our area do not have enough of a sense of purpose. Sense of purpose?  How does that relate?  I see numerous kids hanging out with too little to do on a daily basis.  They have no clear purpose in their everyday lives.

William Damone, professor at Stanford University did research (in 2008) on young adults/teens and their sense of purpose.  He found the about 25% of the youth were what he called "disengaged."  They are living only for the here and now.  They are out for a "good time" and not considering any longterm consequences. 

He labeled another 25% as "dreamers."  These are the youth who have unrealistic goals and expectations for their life.  They may think that they are going to have a profession like movie producer, rock star, sports hero.  I am not saying these goals are not attainable.  A young man comes to mind who is from Waterville and is a movie producer.  What makes him different from the dreamers is that both he and his parents had goals along with hard work meant to achieve his dreams.

Then there were the 30% that William Damone called "dabblers."  These were the young adults who try everything, but commit to nothing.  These people drift from one focus to another leaving no time to attain any goals.

Finally, only about 20% of the youth interviewed were labeled as "engaged" with a sense of purpose. Research has shown that people's happiness is at its peak when they are pursueing goals that interest, compel and challenge them.  It's also important that people feel that they are doing something that matters and will make a contribution to life.

What can we do as parents?  I think all of us have to help our children, especially teens to find their own path to purpose in life.  We need to continually keep the communication going about both short and long term goals.  This may be as simple as, "What are you going to spend your time doing this summer?"  "Do you want to get a job,  volunteer or work on your soccer skills?"  " Are you saving up for a car?"  Discuss how short term goals can lead to achieving their long term goals like college or a career.  Too much idle time is good for no one. We all need that sense of purpose in our life no matter what stage we are at in our lives.